The Wonderful Life of the Gillands :)

Reading about how important it is to really know your spouse in chapter 3 and 4 in Gottman’s book, “The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work" was amazing. He talked about knowing and have a “love map” with your spouse. A love map is knowing everything about your spouse and being able to talk and communicate with your spouse in a loving way.   I really loved how he said,"...emotionally intelligent couples are intimately familiar with each other's world. I call this having a richly detailed love map… Another way of saying this is that these couples have made plenty of cognitive room for their marriage."  A Couple that loves each other take time to know everything they can about one another. They build a strong foundation together to be able to get through all the fun, happy times and the hard trying times. Gottman talks about the importance of this and how knowing your spouse will cause you to have a strong love map and that they are able to become stronger together through “marital storms.”

Reading about the importance of making a love map with your spouse and making sure you take time and effort in knowing each other reminded me of the story of the 3 pigs and the big bad wolf. I would like to be the big that took time and worked hard to make sure he had a strong foundation and home to protect him and his loved ones from the big bad wolf.  He had to work and do that before the wolf even came. I know this is a silly comparison but we need to be able to work just as hard with our spouses and families to make sure we are there for each other and raise each other up even before something comes to try and knock us down.

Something that we need to do is always remember take time to remember the good times with our spouse and all that they do for us and for our family. Being married to my husband in the temple, helps remind me of the importance of making sure I am always trying to make my marriage stronger. We have a perfect and flawless example of this, Jesus Christ. He loves us perfectly and did everything He could to help us become like Him.  If we remember his love and sacrifices for us, how much easier would it be to decide to love instead or argue?

"Love one another as Jesus loves you

Try to show kindness in all that you do.

Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought,

For these are the things Jesus taught."

  -I’m Trying to Be like Jesus, Primary Song