Family
relationships are so important. When you are dating you don't realize
that there is more than
just you and your future spouse relationship you
have to build and consider. Not all the relationships
are with
individuals either. You need to make sure that your relationship you
have with your husband
with finances is strong. Too many couples suffer
from disagreeing or having debt when it comes to
their finances. In
"Till Debt do Us Part" by Poduska, it talks about this important
relationship. He said
something that would help everyone if they just
follow a savings plan. "If you live within your means,
you are able to
draw on uncommitted funds as the need arises. You are then able to
enjoy the freedom
and flexibility that come from a lock of
indebtedness." Something that my husband and I started when
first
married was living within our means and to some is seemed like we were
living well below our
means. Before we had children and both worked and
were going to school we didn't have to heat on at
all in our apartment
till probably January in Rexburg. To us it didn't seem necessary to
spend money on
that when we were gone all day and then pretty much just
slept and woke up and went to school/work.
We had family members telling
us we were crazy. Some offered to pay our heating bill, which was so
sweet of them but we had enough money to pay for it bu as a couple it
didn't seem worth paying
$100 a month on something that would be on
while we weren't home. That might be crazy example but
it worked for
us. Another example that worked great for us was paying for our own
college education.
We both worked and paid bills and saved as much as we
could. When we had our wonderful son, I
stopped working and was able to
be home with him all day. My husband went to school full time and
worked full time plus each week. I have no clue how we did it but
because we realized the importance
of being debt free and having a
strong relationship as a family with our finances we were able to
accomplish this task.
Another relationship you
want to have strong is with the in-laws. I am so grateful that my
family loves
and has really added my husband to our family. They love
and adore him and are so grateful for him.
There have been times were a
couple siblings were being the protect ones where it causes a ripple
affect
but they soon realized they were being silly. Harper, J.M. &
Olsen in their "Creating Healthy Ties With
the In-Laws and Extended
Family," talk about the importance of the in-laws and extended family
allowing space and growth for a new family. When someone gets married,
that family they just started
is their greatest priority. Sometimes this
causes problems within families because members aren't ready
to let go
or want to be still the leading role in their children's lives. Harper,
J.M. & Olsen talk about the
greatest gift a family can give
newlywed is the space and being respectful to the new couple and family.
I have friends that don't have relationships at all with their in-laws
because they couldn't let go of their
son or daughter and were
manipulative and controlling. It is so sad to see this happen. But to
have their
family and marriage strong they had to draw a line. I am
grateful for my in-laws and how they love my
family and children so
much. I can see it being hard to let go of your child you love so much
and having
them make their own family and decisions. I am grateful for
my family that I was able to create my
husband. There is nothing more
special or important to us than each other and our children.
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